You would think I get a high from quitting jobs, as I've done it twice in one month, however I promise you that's not the case. It's quite the opposite for me. I don't know how I'm going to pay my bills. I don't know how long it will be until my next meal is something other than a Little Ceasar's pizza. I wonder, "is God forcing me to be a Liberty Tax Waver as some ultimate lesson in humility?" I had to quit my job as a waitress at Bristol's brand new Cheddar's. They had me working (as in constantly burning calories) for 7+ hours without any food. No breaks. I couldn't believe it, much less stand it. Please refrain from looking at their menu so it will be easier for you to boycott them for life with me.
I really didn't know what I was going to do. I mean, I'm in this itty bitty town during a recession and quit my job at the only place that was hiring. But I was rapidly losing weight and just didn't believe that my God wanted me to keep working at this place! The tips were getting me nowhere close to minimum wage. I don't think I could have payed my bills if I stayed. So in an act of FAITH I quit. That was all I stepped out on though. I definitely didn't step out on joy. I was in a bad mood for days. I couldn't believe God had me go through all that for nothing.
Sunday I went with Carrie to her church and it was weird. We were late, so we walked in during the middle of some song I've never heard. The lyrics are all about God providing. Next, the pastor talks about God providing and how "you have to remember when He's pulled you through before, then you can have FAITH He'll do it again." Next a member of the church stood up to talk about tithing....womp WOMMMMP. Having been on the receiving end of tithes for months, and a contributing member to society for only two short-lived weeks, I hadn't given tithing any thought. This guy talked about how there were times he gave his money to the Lord even though he didn't know how he could buy groceries without it, but God always provided, even blessed him.
When we got home, Carrie can tell you, I was still in a bad mood. I made myself be a hip christian and journal. I wrote about all those past times God provided. I started thinking and remembered how after graduation the Lord had given me a part-time job just in time to start making my $200-a-month car payment. Then right before my student loan payments started, and I was going to need a full-time job, He provided one. That first paycheck was in the bank just DAYS before I had to make my payment too. I remembered how I pretty much wrote a letter on the back of the envelope to my creditor, telling them "I didn't know how I was going to pay but look how God provided! Psalm121!!! all blessings flow etc etc". I give God praise every month on the back of those envelopes. I remembered how I didn't think I could work for a nonprofit organization because of my loans, but God provided for that AND THEN SOME! Next Carrie talked to me about tithing, reminding me the fifty-cent tips I got waitressing were still fifty-cent tips I hadn't had before. I knew I needed to tithe, so with less than three figures in my account I made a donation to Megan Boudreaux's organization, Respire Haiti.
Meanwhile...(as in yesterday) I went to Carrie's office and helped them edit videos, praying God would give her a giant job where she could afford to hire me or I'd get a big babysitting gig. I couldn't see how else I'd be saved. Carrie reminded me I shouldn't put God in a box. Uh!!! She's always right! Yesterday afternoon our friend Elyssia calls saying this woman came in to cater an event for her office. Somehow the woman found out Elyssia was a christian. She asked Elyssia to pray for her. She really needed a christian girl to come work for her cafe/catering co./country store full-time. Soooooo yup. I am now that girl. Seriouslywhattheheckthisissocrazy!!! It's amazing! My new boss is a mix of the Virgin Mary and Paula Deen. OH! AND GET THIS------- AS MUCH FOOD AS I WANT ALL DAY FOR FREE!!!!!!! The first thing I saw when I walked in the store was a chalkboard that had this written on it: For I know the thoughts and plans that I have for you, says the Lord, thoughts and plans for welfare and peace and not for evil, to give you hope in your final outcome. Then you will call upon Me, and you will come and pray to Me, and I will hear and heed you. Another said, "Miracles happen everyday." Definitely teared up.
It's the cutest place! While I was there someone came in, grabbed a drink, told her they'd pay her later. We know all the same people. Everyone knows everyone. I always wanted to live in Mayberry and now I do! THEN (God was just showing off with this one.) I come to find out she's a Gamecocks fan! She was an Army brat and lived at Ft. Jackson for awhile! She's excited to put my paintings in the store!!! I mean, is this real life?
I did have FAITH God would provide, but I was annoyed that He was making me go through another "trial". It's so stupid of me. How could I ever learn to have FAITH in Him if I didn't go through these unknowing periods? I'd rather have a life where I'm crying half the time and rejoicing the other, than where everything just seems to work out good-enough. God and I's relationship is getting so much tighter this way. Just before this whole job-quiting-extravaganza, God really opened my eyes to the importance of FAITH in Him. If you think about it, Jesus really only rebuked his disciples for unbelief. (The only two times I could come up with, when he rebuked them for other things, were when they didn't "let the little children come to" him and Peter cut off the guard's ear.) We get so caught up in morality (laws) when he just wants our FAITH. Every religion has great morality. We have more of a testimony when we can look ridiculously difficult times in the face and say, "I have FAITH in my God!" That's the stuff that makes zero sense to the rest of the world. FAITH is what people want.
"Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse, that there may be food in my house. Test me in this," says the LORD Almighty, "and see if I will not throw open the floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessing that there will not be room enough to store it."
-Malachi 3:10
Our God is FAITHFUL and WORTHY to be praised! Thanks for sharing this, Katherine.
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